Ritz-Carlton, Boston – Apt. 1420
Weather changes and it is uncomfortably warm. Edna Woolman comes to see us for a moment before leaving. Gene remains in hotel and works on script for publishing.
I walk to theatre with Ilka and see performance. Amazed at the improvement on the performance! John’s scene before Crucifix deeply moving. Go back-stage afterwards and congratulate them.
Moeller to dinner – we discuss Catholicism!
Gene works – suddenly at about 11 P.M. he lays down his pen and says, “For God’s sake, let’s forget make-believe and think of us for a bit”! Order hot cocoa and cakes and then we go to bed!
Clear and warm – Gene sleeps until 12.30 – spend an hour in Charles’ ordering things for Georgia. Go to Guild and ask Cohan to dinner – watch “beach scene” – being horribly over-acted!! All the charm gone! Playing for laughs! Cheap trick!
Home to dinner. Type for Gene.
Make an appointment with Dr. Hildreth. Prefer him to Draper!
“Days Without End” opens New York
Do a lot of phoning for Gene. He has Art McGinley and Philip Sheridan to lunch. I go out so they can discuss boyhood escapades! Go to Ritz to see about stopping there next time we come to New York! (This hotel has changed so!) Lunch Ritz. Go to Henry Miller Theatre for “light rehearsal” meet Gene there and come home. Pell to tea. Klopfer, Larrimores and Mrs. Seymore send us flowers.
We read – and – wait!
After performance, Dana Skinner, Draper and Crouse come to report to us!
The play gets the most ridiculous notices. Unintelligent and stupid. They resented being brought before Christ! We feel they have defeated themselves – in their intent to kill the play.
Gene criticized for “returning to the Church”!!??
A busy day, much phoning, etc. Gene looks bad and acts thoroughly sunk!
I phone Carl and Fania after the play. Carl so dislikes Larrimore (personally) that the “play” is “out” – because of that personal re-action. Carl thinks Lorraine is excellent! Of course, everyone thinks Ilka excellent! She is! But I have never liked the actress playing the wife, “Elsa”! She has no warmth, no passion, no beauty – (I am speaking, naturally, not about the woman personally but as “Elsa”) - what man would care? She to me was always a false note – and beside Ilka, “0”! We are both completely sunk – and take sedative. But, even that, could not bring us sleep! Poor Genie, worked so hard and gave his very self to this wretched play.
Home all day.
Dana Skinner to tea.
Try to read.
Finally, Gene looks at me – comes over and sits beside me on the couch and says, “you still here? You would be!” And he begins to sob – horribly! After a bit he says, “Carlotta, for God’s sake, hold me tight – I feel as if I’d burst through my skin”! Poor darling, he is so unhappy! I always felt this wretched play would hurt him!
lka calls en route to the theatre to get a photograph of Gene.
Dine and arrange papers for going home.
After I’ve been in bed for some time (can’t sleep) Gene crawls into my bed and puts his arms around me and says, so quietly – “Don’t worry – you and I will get on because we really love each. As soon as we get home – out of this gangster’s town – and see Blemie –all will be well again”!
And did I weep – hanging on to him!
Gene rises about noon.
He is far from well. But the heart of all this is a deep physical fatigue – and a deep spiritual ache in his heart! I know my husband, lover, child so well!
But thank God he has got “Days Without End” out of his system. And may the next play give him some joy in its creation!
Am bust with household, getting things running smoothly again.
Boll comes in after dinner – we chat and I make cocoa for him and Gene.
Grey cold day. Still working on papers – and filing cabinets. Writing letters to France – Du Vivier, Marie Kalff Lenormand and Josephine.
Gene better each day. I start taking a few exercises – and “breathing” in the morning.
As we are walking up the stair to bed Gene starts reciting Baudelaire’s “The Balcony” to me – so, I know he feels better!
(Sun) Jim Denty arrives to arrange flower holders for me. And Harrison to put in new batteries.
Gene rises late – and works and reads all day. Boll to dinner. Gene begins to talk of buying a motor cycle – a car – a boat!? He is getting restless. Oh dear – if I could only do something to entertain him!
That ghastly consciousness of being 46 – of the unloveliness of middle-age comes over me – so strongly, now and again, that being no longer young is a torture!
Not to myself – but what does Gene feel?
We wake to rain. About noon it begins to clear – and we see our first bit of blue sky and pale sunshine. Gene sleeps late. William Butler Yeats cables from Dublin for permission to put “Days Without End” on in the Abbey Theatre.
Gene cables “Yes”!
Many letters to answer.
Order red lacquer Chinese chest for the living-room and small lacquer for Gene – for his treasures – it has a good Chinese lock.
Begin to arrange things to send to Museum of the City of New York for the James and Eugene O’Neill Show – many photographs must be re-touched – early Monte Cristo ones!
Gene seems not so fit – and very nervous.
Am fearful? Of what?
Gene and I have a test – who (he or I) can recite “Dream Tryst” (by Francis Thompson) without a mistake, He wins- and I am glad – it was our first poem – Oct. 4, 1927.
Typing all morning for Gene – Munsell writes “D.W.E.” is to close next Saturday. Mother of God – and what Gene poured of himself into that play!
“Wilderness” business has fallen off – due to taxie strike, zero weather, or bad acting – or ----------- a little of each!
We walk before lunch. N.E. wind and sunshine.
Boll to dinner. Vera cooks us a delicious turkey, etc.
King of the Belgiums killed mountain climbing.
Charming letters from both Mr. and Mrs. Dana Skinner. They are charmed by the old etiquette books I sent them of the 17th, 18th, and 19th centuries. Freeman, Vera and Edna go to the “Cloister” ball – for their personnel.
Gene autographing “special” edition of “Days Without End”. When I think of that play and what it cost in worry, nerve, energy, physical effort and disappointment – it makes me feel ill!
Cold-wind – showers. To the dentist at 10.45 and back to hotel for luncheon.
Webb there for filling.
Gene and I go to Dr. Busby’s at 3 P.M. then we go to Fortnum and Mason’s to shop. Back to hotel. H.W. phones that Shane has hurt his hip playing football! We discuss this and Gene’s desire to retire. He is not interested in the production end of the theatre!
He tells me I look like a ghost! And, jokingly, says he’ll now have to look after me!!!
Rise very early.
H.W. calls for me at 9.05 A.M. and takes me to Bronx Court House – for Jans vs. O’Neill trial. I sit the whole day through listening to the most vicious obvious lies! What a farce of law and justice! Do not testify. Must return to-morrow. Max Stener’s son is judge. Our insurance company’s lawyers (gentiles!) are very decent men. They take me for a cup of tea at noon.
Send H. Skinner a set of autographed O’Neill for her wedding present at her request.
Rise early and go to Bronx Court. A terribly trying day. Am put in the chair about 2.30. Am very nervous – and amazed by the stupidity, rudeness and insulting method of the lawyer on the opposing side. (I thought of Hitler!) D’Auria keeps reporters away. I consent to one photograph. Feel terrible shakey and ill! Return to hotel – and, after a short rest, pack – and we leave for Georgia, at 10.05 P.M. – Am so exhausted I can hardly breathe.
Gene depressed and nervous.
Pale sun morning – showers afternoon.
Gene rests all day and reads.
Beckwith comes from Jacksonville and cleans out “coils” that have been corroded by sediment from water. Now we have hot water.!
The Jans “case” ended – and the Bronx jury gave their blood-brothers $3,000.00! What an unfair decision – because they came out a side road, not even slowing up and bumped into us on the highway!
Mother sends me beautiful old Chinese pewter candlesticks.
Wake to find the garden and patio strewn with broken branches, from the storm, and all the flower pots upset, a great many broken – a nicer day cooler.
Find English Croquet impossible on our lawn – so send for an American set.
Boll to dinner. Vera is becoming a really good cook – and learned quickly – a good head!
Gene seems to feel better he is in his post-production phase – so, I look after him, doctor him and love him but don’t speak unless I’m spoken to!! One day he’ll come out of it!
A lovely day on the coolish side. Write many letters – do up packages. Put Gene’s things to air and then they’ll be packed away in trunks.
Vera makes a delicious raquot – with Burgundy and herbs. I only had to show her once! Good girl.
A quite coolish night.
Enjoying reading “Seven Gothic Tales”
Sunshine and cool – perfect day. Gene suns himself on his “look-out” before lunch all this time. I have been giving him “shots” of insulin twice a day – that means boiling needles – watching meticulously “content” of dose given, and then sticking needle in him – which is a torture for me to do! He is so thin it is difficult to find enough to use the needle without causing hurt!
He rests and reads a great deal. Tonight, when we were in our rooms he called me. I went to his room – and he said, “You don’t love me any more”! “Oh, Genie, don’t say that. I nurse you and care for you all day long”! “That’s not telling me you love me”! “Must I say it”? “You damn well must, and you stay right here and tell me again, and again and again – until I believe you”!
Sun warm – No breeze – so we have sand flies!
Gene swims, then suns himself.
Has insulin twice.
Send Sapaloe baskets to Carl and Fania.
Our neighbours have a party on the beach – The “Washboard Orchestra” keeps up its endless entertainment.
Gene looking better.
Warm, sunny day. Gene goes out in the kayak – before luncheon – goes all the way to the Casino and back! Has 2 “shots” – 7 – Rests after luncheon.
Receive letter from Henry Duffy re his production of “Ah, Wilderness” in San Francisco – and photographs. Wire from Mrs. Wurzburg asking if we want the camp this year – for August and September?
Gene and I play croquet – he beats me badly!!
Boll calls after dinner.
An unbelievably horrible day! It clears about 6 P.M.
Endless wire from Madden re “stolen letters” and deeply hurt that he should be blamed!!! Wire from Maurice Wertheim asking Gene to go salmon fishing in Canada. Wire from H.W. re Gotham Bookshop, “stolen letters” and the Law!
Boll to dinner.
Read Willie Maugham’s last play.
Gene and I give up and go to bed.
Awake to grey skies.
During the morning more rain and thunder! June 1st in the sunny South!!!
About 3 P.M. Gene takes a swim – and goes out in his kyak. I lie in a hot herb bath and then dress “royally” for dinner!!
Charming letter from Mme. Lenormand who is still in New York en route to Paris.
Type a letter to Pace for Gene re clipper models!
Frogs screaming their heads off!
A warm day – cool sea breeze. Gene goes out in his kyak before luncheon – rests after luncheon. I write letters for him.
Go over all my shoes with Edna – find mildew there and in hat boxes!!
Gene enjoying Zola all over again – for the fourth or fifth time!
Letter from Geo. Jean – and from Seino (Japan) re his “Life of O’Neill” that he has done in Japanese. Some time past I sent him data and photographs he had asked for. Send Random House corrected “Forewards” for the “Scribner edition”. Gene has 2 “shots” insulin 7. He looks well, seems well, is eating well!
Warm day – but breeze.
Gene swims and goes out in his kyak before luncheon.
Beach covered with small, dead, smelly fish – that have come ashore from the nets of the Portuguese fisherman. After luncheon siesta.
Vera makes us sherbet and cake for tea.
Lovely full moon.
Write Saxe and Madden for Gene.
He has had a lovely model of a Chinese junk made for me for my wedding anniversary! (July 22) – Lovely!
Give Gene 2 “shots” insulin 8°
Warm day with breeze. Gene goes off fishing at 9.30 – with his luncheon pail. Catches mackerel, trout, shark, and stingaree!
Home about 6 P.M.
I go over bills and work in garden all day – telling Bone in what shape to trim hedges and shrubs.
Beautifully full moon – Gene and I sit out on my balcony.
He tells me he missed me today!?
I missed him too!
(Sat) Warm day with breeze. Wire from pappa.
Letter from Dana.
Gene swims before luncheon – After luncheon siesta.
Lie in perfumed bath to get cool before dinner. (I have such a huge and lovely bathroom – it always rests me!)
Gene tells me he has made up his mind to buy a Lincoln!!!
I give him 2 “shots” insulin 10°
Hitler killing again to keep down revolution!??
Warm day – breeze. Gene swims before luncheon – feels a bit giddy – is it insulin? 10° taken this morning. We stop this run of treatments.
After luncheon thunder storms all ‘round – but nothing here.
Read – lie in bath.
Boll to dinner.
Doctor Blemie – the “ham bone” has really made him ill – poor dear.
(Fri) Warm day- Gene swims before luncheon. I wire New York banks re Trust income – send off all cheques – and type letters for Gene. We receive beautiful 23 lb. salmon from Maurice Wertheim from Canada – on ice and in perfect condition! We have some for dinner and it is delicious.
Gene not feeling up to much. Cool breeze at night. Wire from Geo. Jean – he is on boat en route to Savannah.
Ill during night – salmon too rich for me! Maybe I ate too much.
Warm day. Gene feels low. He and George Jean swim before lunchon. Gene and I have a siesta after luncheon.
We talk until dinner and then discuss “love” and “marriage”.
Vera, Edna, and Freeman to see movie of “Emperor Jones”.
Do not sleep!
Gene and Geo. Jean swim before luncheon. Rest afterwards.
Boll to dinner. After dinner, a great deal of arguing and Geo. Jean telling (as his yearly bit) all the things that he dislikes about the Guild lot, - and particularly Langner. - Gene surprises him by saying some of the things Geo. Jean has said he (Gene) agrees with! Then smiling in his most charming smile to Geo. Jean, he says, “Remember, you are talking about my business associates!”
We giggle and that’s that!
Fruit arrives from Jacksonville.
Terribly hot 95° in shade on my balcony.
We pant all day!
Boll to dinner.
I type (and write) letter for Gene. After dinner we are surrounded by thunder storms – none hit us – it cools and brings a breeze.
University of California wants to do “Lazarus Laughed” next April with Pichel – Gene says, “Yes”!
Warm with breeze.
John O’Neal arrives in his car before luncheon. How – I cannot imagine! The “car” gave a “puff” and stopped – just before the entrance door! No one could budge it! We had to get a mechanic from the garage. And, he came from New York!? Rest after luncheon.
Gene and John swim.
Dine and chat.
Stiff breezes at night!
Hot moist day - 92° on my balcony. John leaves at 10.30 for Charleston.
Too hot for Gene to swim! Siesta after lunchon. Gene sits in the gold fish pond in the patio! Vera nearly faints when she sees him!
McGarvey comes and we discuss tool-house.
Thunder storms all about us.
Very warm after dinner.
Light breeze which becomes brisk East wind toward night. It dies off as the moon comes out.
Gene swims before luncheon. Then rests after luncheon. Painter comes so that I can arrange for work while we are in the North – select colours, etc. Rehang photographs. Humidity heavy – “sits” on one’s head – so to speak!
Reports are – the middle-west burning up! Cattle dying, no water. This is horrible – I have seen them dying on their feet! Their hooves almost running through their flesh! It haunted me for months – and now, years later, makes me sad! Why is there so much suffering in life – for man and beast? Could some philosophy change this?
A day of heat and humidity. Gene swims before luncheon. Too hot for siesta after lunch.
Write and type letters for Gene. Hear from John O’Neal (he arrived!), from Cerf - and Madden re Spanish translations. I have already written to “Mirlas” about this.
Night terribly humid.
Have discovered that the floor of Gene’s shower is about to fall into the kitchen!!!
Oh, the unscrupulous builders!
Gene swims before luncheon. I type for Gene. Have Freeman get luggage out of box room to air and clean it for journey North. Try to rest after luncheon too much wind and thunder.
Gene low in spirit – depressed – and says he will never be able to work again! (After each production he has had this depression and set-back, - but he will work again – and well. I know it!)
Nothing makes Gene happy for any length of time – and, now that his health is not good, he is more easily upset – and harder to keep interested or amused. He now wants to live somewhere else – after all the work, time, love and money that has gone into our “home” – I am now afraid it will always be like this!
Finish packing. Gene swims before lunchon – and before dinner. Heinrich and Brown come to get last order on painting. Harrison call. Alfred Jones to tea and discuss the progress of the Sea Island Co. Dinner 6.30 we leave at 7.45 P.M. for Thalmann take 9.09 train for New York – air conditioned – after the first cool shock – it becomes comfortable and pleasant.
Gene seems, suddenly, almost gay! I presume being on the move again pleases his restlessness!
Do not sleep – but rest.
Rise early and shop.
Cerf and Klopfer lunch with us. Dana and Father Vincent Donovan to tea. Pack – dine and take 10.15 P.M. train for Tupper Lake Junction. What a road bed! Like a mountain goat hopping about!
Can’t sleep – Gene starts singing ridiculous songs.
Chilly morning. Write to Father Chapman for Gene. Write Elizabeth.
Letter from D. Wakefield – who has lost all her money in the failure of a Pittsburgh bank and bad mortgages – what on earth will she do?
Also, letters from Cohan and Taylor – and Vera. We are after the ants again. How long?
Gene swims before luncheon. After, we read, play tennis – I write letters for Gene and myself. Gene and Napolean fish before dinner – they get 2 bass.
Gene feels better today. After dinner - rain and thunder.
A dreary, lonely feeling up here on the lake!
A grayish day with cold sunshine. Gene tries to work then gives it up!
We lunch early and Nap and Madeleine go to town for mail and shopping. Gene takes a long row – and swims. After dinner he and Nap go fishing. They return about 9.30 – and Gene looks very shamefaced as he says, “I didn’t catch any fish but I fell in the lake”! Which was true, he walked backwards into one of the boat slips on the dock.
I take it easy all day – write all the letters and read.
The last year’s tame chipmunk has returned to eat out of Gene’s hand!
A cold night!
Heavy fog in early morning. Fog rising – we have pale sunshine – rather beautiful – bringing out the autumn colours! Write long letter to Cyn – to Mother – to Casa Genotta. Explain to Gene why I do not want to go to California now – besides – Mother is better.
Gene talks to me of “Bessie Bowen” – now to be known as “Bessie Bollen” (to save confusion with the Revolutionary character!)
After dinner – after Madeleine had gone – after I had gone through a pretence of reading – Gene came over and sat down beside me – put his arms around me – laid his head on my shoulder and said, “For God’s sake always love me, never leave me”! – “I could never not love you nor could I live without you”!
Strange day – thunder, rain, and sun in rotation.
Gene works in the forenoon. Swims before luncheon. We receive ridiculous letter from Cerf asking if the report that Garbo is to play “Bessie Bowen” has any foundation – Gene wires back, “NO”!
I write letters and wash my hair, (a difficult job in this house)
After dinner Gene and Nap go fishing. Get a mess of bull heads! I go out to look at the moon and the stars – over the lake – and there is my Genie with no coat on and I am doctoring him for cold chill. He is exactly like a child!
A beautiful golden moon – and stars, in the clear mountain air!
Not a very pleasant day. Coolish and windy. Gene works in the morning. We read a “critique” of Gene’s work by one Helen E. Davis. Not bad! Rest after luncheon. Play tennis, done and read – I have begun a new series on French history from Louis XI (one of my “pets”!)
Box from Charles
Can’t get to sleep.
Gene keeps writing plays!
I keep building and furnishing houses and creating gardens!
A pleasant day. Gene can’t work and feels low. (Liver?) After luncheon he reads, swims and then goes fishing with Nap.
I am reading a book on “Tolstoy” and “Nietzsche” and find Nietzsche more unbalanced than I formerly thought! Oh, for Youth and “Zarathustra” and Strindberg – and now O’Neill! God bless him! We both worshipped at the same altars! Dostoievsky I much preferred to Tolstoy.
Letter from Lee Simonson!?
Thank Heaven – today is the last time I will have to send a cheque (my share) for the apartment at 1095 park Ave. Two years’ rent money thrown away and in these times when so many people could use it. My grandmother would turn in her grave if she knew I had anything to do with such wicked waste!
Gene is better. Write letters. Hear from Geo. Jean – Lenormands have not turned up per schedule from Samoa!
Gene and I go for a long walk at tea time. He cuts walking sticks for each of us from a white birch tree.
He “entices” me on the walk home – I love it!
We dine and retire early.
Raining and warmer. Clears before luncheon. Gene low and depressed. Tells me he could meet people if he were alone!!!?? I offer to go to New York – first doing all the Casa Genotta shopping – then attending to all our business – and return to Georgia – he could remain in New York, see his friends and come home at his own pleasure. Personally, I would like to try this – as Gene will never go any place with me – or see anyone – outside of 4 or 5 “business associates” – then we could do – each of us - what would be pleasing to us individually!
Feel wretched physically – would like to return to a comfortable bed, good food. I do not care for fishing or the wilds! It is only to try to make him comfortable that I am here!
Boll arrives on 8.50 A.M. train. Here about 9.15
A grey dull morning – I go for a row – luncheon – we all have a siesta.
Gene, Boll and Nap go fishing.
After dinner they go fishing again.
A grey day. Gene rows and swims. I row – the Lake is rough!
Luncheon – Gene, Boll and I take a long walk in the woods. Gene cuts branches for walking sticks. Boll gathers “growths” off trees to make drawings on! I collect beautiful leaves!
Dinner – we talk of Sea Island and what we don’t like about it! About California – Somoa – etc.
Letter from Mrz Wurzburg. Write Cyn.
Have been upset by a letter from New York re Gene. I do not believe a word of it! But, it makes me feel as if snakes were everywhere about me! And, I am terrified of snakes!
Reach Grand Central 7.10 A.M. Go to the Madison – what a joy to have a hot tub bath – and to be able to order a good breakfast. Webb turns up at 9 to “maid” us while we’re here. Gene has barber. He has me make an appointment this afternoon for Draper – he also sees Dana, and John Pell. I have shampoo, manicure and pedicure, and feel more myself.
Gene enjoys talking at great length with John Pell of American History.
I am tired and fearful!?
Pappa sends us beautiful flowers from his houses.
Lovely day – to Christine’s for hats – to Bergdorfs – lunch with Gene and Crouse at hotel and then Gene and I go to Fortnum and Mason’s. Gene orders things and so do I – and back to hotel.
pappa calls. Geo. Jean and Sean O’Casey to dinner.
Geo. Jean is good trim and O’Casey a darling.
Up early. Gene sleeps. Go to Christine’s, Fortnum and Mason’s and Colitti.
Lunch Gene – and he comes with me to Henckle’s to look at some things I thought he might like. Then he goes to Draper and I to Bergdorf. Saxe to tea. Gene and I dine and go see “Lucienne Boyer-Ercudero” performance. Too long and badly done. We leave early and he lost a black silk scarf I gave him and he is very upset. Says, “Serves me right for going to the theatre”!!
Rise early. To Colitti’s for a fitting. Order flowers for Carl and Fania for Oct. 21. Have manicure. Return to hotel and lunch with Gene and Fania. Send dear Bushie some extra good cigars!
Saxe and his wife to dinner. pappa calls on Gene – and Gene goes to Draper.
King Alexander of Jugoslavia is shot by a Croatian – Louis Barthou is shot at Marseilles - !!! War?
To Dr. Johnson, with Gene, for our eyes – then I go to Hildreth – (he does a bit of cutting) – back to Madison for lunch with Gene, Cerf, Klopfer. To Museum of City of New York – to see “James and Eugene O’Neill” exhibition. Harriet Kriesler phones. Draper phones to say all specimens are O.K.! (good!)
We dine at the Colony with Geo. Jean and O’Casey. A most pleasant evening.
Hear a wee “polite note” that I wrote to M. Boyd is for sale in one of “those” book shops – send some one to get it! It was on Le Plessis note paper.
Go to Ernst re M. Boyd selling my letter. Decide to ignore it! To Lewis and Couger for another bird cage for the new birds. I am taking a Japanese nightingale back with me for Gene.
We lunch and then Gene goes to Ginnever – and then to Draper. I take signed books to Carl. pappa phones and sends flowers.
Gene’s 46th birthday!
He receives presents, wires, flowers galore. I ordered him a birthday cake, the chef here made him one, and Webb brought him another!!!
Harriet Kreisler to lunch – Gene to Ginnever and Draper.
Geo. Jean and O’Casey to dinner. A lovely dinner. Geo. Jean a bit blotto! O’Casey came from a dress rehearsal of “Within the Gates”!
Letter from Cyn.
Gene goes to Ginnever. After luncheon we got to see “Within the Gates” – Terrible! The play no good – and the production and acting unbelievably bad!
And O’Casey is a dear!
Back to hotel – worn out.
Dine and to bed.
Finish all shopping and packing. Geo. Jean and O’Casey to luncheon.
A touching farewell!
Madden call. Weal phones that there is a rumor that Gene has won the Nobel prize!
We are both exhausted.
Dine and take the 10.05 P.M. train for Georgia.
I am carrying a Japanese nightingale and another canary for Gene.
A long day. Arrive at Nahunta at 7.25 P.M. Gould and Boll meet us – with the new Lincoln. Freeman there with the Buick to take the luggage.
Thought I’d never get there! The house in excellent order! I kissed Blemie!
Gould and Boll stay to dinner. Gene as nervous as a witch!
Still unpacking and going over house.
Gene swims and suns himself. To-day he is very relaxed. No energy. Thank God we are home.
Read where Tellegen has committed suicide by stabbing himself seven times with a large pair of scissors, in his heart! Mother of God – how could he have the strength and courage?
At my desk all day – going over mail and papers.
Gene swims and suns himself – warm day.
Gould and Boll to dinner – leave early.
When they leave I throw myself on the long Queen Anne couch – when Gene sees me there he comes over and lies down beside me – puts his face in my neck and weeps like a broken-hearted child! Weeping always relieves his high nerve tension! I sooth and hold him tight. And, in about 20 minutes, take him upstairs and put him to bed. Stay with him all night and he keeps hold of me even while asleep, poor nerve-ridden love of mine!
“Armistice Day” 14 years
Much cooler – but sun. Carl sends photographs of wedding cake and flowers I sent him and Fania on their wedding anniversary!
Gene works – has insulin and reads. We go for a walk after tea – and discuss mystic psychology and “Testament for To-morrow”.
Dress – give Gene insulin and Boll dines with us.
Another cold day. Gene works and tries to swim – water like ice! – and he becomes unhappy and dissatisfied! Says he must follow the sun! Insulin – and rest.
Again, insulin and dinner. Boll joins us.
Doctoring Blemie’s feet. Cold wind.
Why is it Life must become less pleasant – and Death less frightening?
Not so cold. Gene works and we walk on beach before luncheon. Blemie is bathed and not dried thoroughly and gets another attack of rheumatism.
At luncheon we discuss hanging of pictures – which leads to strange roads!?
I am going over house books. Gene goes to meet Saxe at Thalmann on 5.27 P.M. train.
After dinner Gene shows off “Rosie” and Fisk-iana
Try to make Blemie more comfortable.
Much warmer day. Gene works until 1.30. I work at yearly accounts and house mail.
After luncheon we read then motor to Butler Island at Brunswick. Dine and read. We discuss Zola’s “The Masterpiece” and the extraordinary understanding he had – and was able to explain of the suffering of the creator!!
Gene weighs 154 lbs.
High tides – damp – sun and mist – around 72°
Gene reads most of last night “Germinal” and is all in to-day – but works just the same.
I take my yearly accounts to Boll and he uses his adding machine to help me do my additions. See and chat with Mr. Coffin. After luncheon we have a siesta.
Give Gene a shot of insulin before dinner.
Boll joins us at dinner.
Gene sleeps late – then works. Gets the idea of dramatizing “Germinal”.
I work on household things and write letters.
Send my original “notes” of “Mourning Becomes Electra” (as a gift) to “The American Academy of Arts and Letters”. I don’t like giving these to them one bit! Also, send them a facsimile of the inscription to me in “Mourning Becomes Electra”. Why?? Take “papers” to notary for Gene and send them off to H.W.
We hear “Days Without End” got a good Press in Amsterdam!
The photographs are very interesting.
Much colder 58° at 7.30 A.M. I am busy with household and letters. Gene rises late and works after luncheon. Gene and Saxe listen to Harvard and Yale football game on radio. We dine at 6.30 and Freeman takes Saxe to Thalmann for the train to New York.
Am deeply interested in “The Life of Don Juan of Austria”, will always remember his effigy on his tomb in the Escoxical – in Spain.
After we have been quietly reading for about an hour Gene pipes up, in his special little boy’s voice, and says, “Gee, it’s good to be alone again, isn’t it?” Which amused me, no end. Gene would have been a marvelous actor!
N.E. wind and coolish. Gene sleeps late –reads - we lunch – he reads – I have a siesta.
Then we talk – dine and read. I am going through all the books I can find on Don Juan of Austria.
Gene is absolutely at loose ends – about his health, his work – money – alimony, children – life –
It leaves me beside myself. I can do more – am giving my love – loyalty, services (in every way) and money!
Nothing seems to help.
This restless – always dissatisfied – God help us – it mist be caused, in part, by some illness we can’t put our finger on!
The sun finally breaks through the fog.
Work in garden with Estes. Re new plantings, changes and hedges.
Gene sleeps until nearly 11.30. Breakfast, works until 5 – and then we take a long walk on the beach and he tells me of the 3 plays in his mind.
Then, after a pause, he says, “There is something else I want to tell you – I always love you – no matter how I behave”!!! And that is Gene!
Grey cloudy, dreary. Typing letters for Gene. Still arranging for Christmas remembrance.
The garden looks so nice!
Boll to luncheon.
Write Sisk and Wallace.
Rain begins about 5 P.M.
Gene getting tense in his work – shows he is really getting into it!
Cold and clear. Typing for Gene and tying up Christmas packages.
Gene works at his first day of dialogue on “Bessie Bollen”. Drawings arrive from Buenos Aires of “Great God Brown”. The masks are particularly well done.
Also, receive interesting photographs of Swedish production of “Great God Brown” – Gene pleased! (I am glad!)
We go for a walk on the beach and Gene tells me he would like to do “Bessie Bollen” and the “four” plays – with no stop for production – no rest between. (Do hope he has settled in work) _ _ _ “and then take a long European motor tour”!!!
Not so cold.
Gene working I am still wrapping Christmas packages. We make cumquat jam – of the cumquats that were not frozen.
Hear that over 50% of the citrus crop in Florida was ruined. Gene and I walk after luncheon. Blemie goes through water cut-off and gets soaking wet.
Boll for dinner and the night. After dinner I type for Gene.
Showers and then clear – air balmy – night cold. Type long letter to Mirlas for Gene – and send him “Days without End” and “Ah Wilderness”. Still at Christmas chores. Gene works – after lunch reads – and sits in patio – we walk before dinner.
Letter from Madden
“ “ H.W. re income tax
“ “ Geo. Jean.
Gene works until 12.30 – and then we walk before luncheon. After luncheon we finish giving “tips” to all those on the island who, in any way, serve us.
We receive dozens of wires, cards and letters.
“Scott” writes I can have his radio for Gene!
Boll to Dinner – and Vera does her best!
After dinner we light the tree – and Freeman, Vera and Edna come in with us while we give out presents. This seems to make them very happy – and then they have their dinner!
We open our presents – listen to some good music and have a pleasant evening.
Pappa wires me for my birthday. N.E. wind and rain.
Gene works. I am at my desk for 6 hours!
Letter from Munsell saying Cohan wants to cut “Ah, Wilderness” tour short!
Charming letter from Al. Frueh. Pappa sends me a very beautiful old Florentine bottle encased in silver and small diamonds. It is really a museum piece. Presents from mother and Cyn.
Send off income tax data to Ernst.
Freeman drives Gene into Brunswick to meet Shane.
Bus is an hour late.
N.E. wind, mist – very damp, chilly day.
Shane rises late and I try to entertain him – and attend to some house mail.
Luncheon, I rest and read. Gene takes over role of entertainer. We dine and read.
A strange year – one filled
with worries – and anxieties
of all sorts – Gene not well –
Cyn married – Gene
resting and fussed
But – I have Gene!
“Days Without End”
“Since I have lost the words, the flower
Of youth and the fresh April breeze –
Give my thy lips; their perfumed dower
Shall be the whisper of the trees.
Since I have lost the deep sea’s sadness
Her sobs, her restless surge, her graves –
Breathe but a word, its grief or gladness
Shall be the murmur of the waves.
Since in my soul a somber blossom
Broods, and the suns of yore take flight –
Oh, hide me in thy pallid bosom,
And it shall be the calm of night!”
Villiers de L’Isle – Adam
And that, Darling, says it – if only a part of it – a lot more beautifully than I ever could!
I love you!